We talk a lot about emotional intelligence these days. It’s the buzzword of the decade. Workplaces run entire training sessions on how to communicate with empathy, regulate emotions, and listen actively (instead of just waiting for their turn to speak). And I love that. Emotional intelligence has changed how we lead, relate, and even date.

But emotional intelligence isn’t enough.

Because you can be emotionally intelligent and still be completely clueless when someone doesn’t come from your culture, speak your language, or share your worldview.

Enter: cultural intelligence.

And if you travel—or want to connect meaningfully across cultures—it’s just as important. Possibly more.

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What Is Cultural Intelligence?

Cultural intelligence (CQ) is your ability to relate to and work effectively across cultures. It’s being able to read the room when the room was built entirely differently to yours. It’s that internal voice that says, “Maybe don’t assume,” or “Let’s just check before we do that.”

It’s what allows you to notice that a smile doesn’t always mean happiness, that silence isn’t necessarily awkward, and that no, your way isn’t the “normal” way.

I once asked on Instagram, “What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?”

People replied with tarantulas, snakes, fermented foetuses—you know, the usual.

But then a Maasai man replied: “Pizza.”

And it hit me.

Nothing is inherently weird. It’s all just perspective.

So maybe it’s time we stop calling things “weird” and start calling them different. Or better yet—interesting.

Why Cultural Intelligence Matters in Travel (And in Life)

When I moved to Ireland at 17 to work with horses, my English was in theory pretty solid… or so I thought. But no one had prepared me for an Irish accent! I went from being able to hold perfectly good conversations to suddenly not understanding a single word!

Add to it the fact that my entire equestrian vocabulary was in Spanish, and I was truly lost!

So when someone told me to get the martingale, I just stared blankly.

Had they said tijerillas, I’d have sprinted off with confidence.

Instead, they repeated it louder, with a colourful Irish swear word thrown in for good measure.

That moment taught me two things:

1. Speaking slower can help.
2. But speaking slower with a patronising tone makes you look like a jerk.
3. Just because someone say “What?” doesn’t mean they are deaf!

I’ve since seen travellers do this abroad—speaking to locals in the same voice they’d use with a toddler. Others assume they are deaf and just repeat it, but louder. If that’s your go-to, ask yourself: “Do I think this person is deaf or just… foreign?”

If it’s the latter, maybe try rephrasing, not patronising.

Cultural Intelligence Is the Secret to Being a Better Traveller

Travel teaches cultural intelligence—but only if you’re paying attention.

Take my job running tours in Africa. One of the biggest challenges? Time.

No, not time zones. Just… time. As a concept.

My guests are briefed in advance that “on time” in Sierra Leone or Tanzania doesn’t mean the same as “on time” in Germany or the UK. But when 9am rolls around and the bus hasn’t left yet, the frustration creeps in.

A customer once text me:

“I’m tired of Sierra Leone deciding our schedule when we are the ones paying. They can work on our time tomorrow.”

I’ll give you one guess whose side I took—and no, it wasn’t the customer’s.

If you expect everything to work like it does at home… stay home.

But if you want to grow, challenge yourself, and experience another way of life, then travel. Just… travel with cultural intelligence.

And by the way, the bus was never more than 15 minutes late, which for anyone who has travelled in Sierra Leone will know it’s close to a miracle!

Seven Ways to Build Cultural Intelligence (Without Being That Tourist)

1. Ditch “Normal” and Embrace “Different”

What’s normal for you might be bizarre elsewhere. And vice versa.

So next time you see something that surprises you, pause. Don’t label it “weird.” Ask yourself, “What would this look like through their lens?”

2. Do Your Research—but Stay Curious

A quick read on local customs can save you a world of awkwardness.

But don’t stop there. Stay curious. Ask respectful questions. And accept that you’ll never fully “understand” a culture after a few days—but you can try.

3. Watch More Than You Speak

Want to know how things work? Observe.

See how locals greet one another, how they queue (or don’t), how decisions are made. Then follow suit. It’s less about blending in, and more about honouring the space you’re in.

4. Speak Slower—but Not Like They’re Stupid

Please, please, please don’t adopt that condescending sing-song voice I’ve seen people use with non-native English speakers. Speak clearly, yes. But with respect.

If someone doesn’t understand you, try simpler words.

5. Be Willing to Get It Wrong (And Laugh With Yourself)

I once made a casual joke about corn syrup in front of someone from the U.S. They didn’t laugh. I soon realised I’d insulted their entire food industry.

British sarcasm doesn’t always travel well. In fact, sometimes it just crashes and burns.

I’ve had to learn to tone it down, especially when speaking to people from different cultures.

The lesson? Cultural intelligence means knowing when to leave the dry humour at home.

6. Stay Humble—Even When You’re Paying

Money doesn’t mean superiority. It just means you have money.

That doesn’t buy you the right to control how things are done in someone else’s country.

It’s their home. You’re the guest. Act accordingly.

7. Let Go of Control

Sometimes, things won’t go to plan. The ferry will be late. The guide will arrive “soon” (which could mean anything from five minutes to never). The food might be different from what you expected—and better.

You can fight it, or you can let it go.

And if you’re the kind of person who needs everything to run like clockwork, just know… cultural intelligence is coming to get you. In the best possible way.

Final Thoughts: The Intelligence That Actually Changes You

If emotional intelligence makes us kinder, cultural intelligence makes us wiser.

It helps us step outside our own ego and see the world through someone else’s eyes. It challenges us to pause, to listen, and to realise that our version of “normal” is just one version.

You don’t have to get it perfect. I certainly haven’t.

But if you travel with curiosity, respect, and a willingness to learn, you’ll see that cultural intelligence doesn’t just change how you experience the world.

It changes you.

And here’s the thing: this isn’t just about travel.

Our workplaces are becoming increasingly diverse (which is a wonderful thing), but diversity alone isn’t enough. We also need awareness, adaptability, and the ability to listen without assuming we already know. In short, we need cultural intelligence not just on the road, but in the office, in our teams, and around every boardroom table.

So whether you are navigating a village market in Sierra Leone or a Monday morning team meetings with colleagues from five countries, the question is the same:

Are you assuming? Or are you observing, listening, and learning?

Ready to travel deeper, not just further?

Join one of my small-group tours designed to immerse you in local life—without the cultural blind spots.

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